There are 30 kids in my class. That’s a lot of children’s shifting emotions to validate and navigate on a regular day, but in the lead-up to the holidays, there have been some even more complex emotions to support.
Here are some emotional responses I noticed from the children last week, in the days before winter break:
- Hyperactivity
- Overstimulation
- Sensitivity to sounds
- Tearfulness
- Conflict between friends
- Screaming or yelling instead of using inside voices
- Pushing, punching, or body slamming instead of using words
- Ignoring instructions from teachers
- Missing parents and home more than usual (separation anxiety)
- Excitement, jitters, nervous energy
- Easily distracted
- Expressed worry over the change in routine during the break
- Not being able to fall asleep during nap time
- Increased frequency of bathroom accidents
As educators, how do we best support children’s emotional regulation when they’re overtired, over-exuberant about gifts, toys, and treats, or overstimulated around the holidays? How do we make sure that we also stay calm and regulated in these moments?
Some strategies I lean on for validating both the children’s emotions and staying tuned into my own:
- Slowing down long enough to let children share an entire thought with me, and making sure I’m really listening to it by reminding other children to wait their turn to talk
- Letting children who request physical support sit beside me or on my lap, hold my hand, or be my helper during group activities
- Dance parties and movement breaks!
- As much uninterrupted free play as possible, while being ready to intervene and guide when conflicts arise between children
- Taking a drink of water as a comfort and response to intense emotions (that vagus nerve, y’all)
- Watching for the things that children are doing correctly and kindly, and making the effort to compliment them on those behaviours (“You two are playing together so well right now, it’s great to see!” or “Good teamwork!” or “Thanks for getting your friend’s mittens for them!”)
- Redirecting instead of lecturing, inviting children to play something else with someone else when aggression crops up
- Showing up with a positive attitude, smiles, and laughter to share
- Getting children to help with cleaning and tidying tasks
- Encouraging everyone to eat or even just try the food for snack or lunch so that we are getting nutrition and energy
- More frequent bathroom reminders
- Sharing comfort items of my own during circle time to normalize using textures and sensory objects to help with regulation (grounding techniques)
- Validating the emotion, letting that emotion sit with us even if it’s icky or uncomfortable, then finding a solution or strategy to either integrate it or make it better
This list is not comprehensive, but I want the children in my classroom to know that I see, hear, and feel their emotional rhythms – and that I experience emotions too – during Christmas and at any other time of the year. Whatever emotions come up, it is the educator’s job to provide children with enough safety and compassion that we can work through those emotions together. The magic is that, over time and with consistent support, children will emulate the tools and words we give them and regulate their own emotions without always needing the grown-up to be there too!
What a gift to know a child well enough to know their emotional landscape, too.
The seasonal calm in Hygge in the Early Years is a lovely companion to this one.